Critical Mass July '09

Another month, another mass ruined by Toronto's Finest. After they crashed the party, I swiftly and unceremoniously bailed.

Memo To Members of Toronto Police Force

re: New Procedures In Effect

In light of the events of Toronto Critical 
Mass on July 31st, 2009, the 
Toronto Police Service is enacting new 
procedures, to be undertaken by all members 
of the Toronto Police Service as soon as
practicable:

1. Using your service 10 tonne industrial 
jack, pry your buttocks into an unclenched 
position.
2. Apply penetrating lubricant generously 
to butt crack area.
3. Give the lubricant 24 hours to set in. 
This will work best if the officer assumes 
the inverse prone position.
4. Firmly attach a hydraulic winch to the 
36+ inch oak trunk that somehow found its 
way up your ass.
5. Run the winch at full power until the 
blockage is dislodged.

Critical Mass June '09

Critical Mass was nice this month due to the lack of police presence. Everyone was happy. More photos here.

Critical Mass (of police) May '09

Unfortunately, Mass was besieged by police again this month. They only seem to come out to bug us in the summer months.

They don't like fun.

I overheard one of them justifying their party-poopery saying that they were just enforcing the law. If so, they should then have given us all tickets for tail gating, and noise violations. The goal wasn't to enforce the law, but to discourage cycling advocacy. What else is new?

Other than the preponderance of negative Nellies, it was a great Mass, with tonnes of energy and hundreds of folks out to have a safe, respectful good time. Too bad that Dredd & Co. showed up.

Critical Mass April '09

Every month it seems like more people are showing up. Last April was a big mass, but I don't think it was this big.

After mass there I always have several hours of really good mood. It must be an endorphin high.

Critical Mass March '09

Here we are congregating. My old ritual was to pick up a burrito at Big Fat Burrito in the market. I didn't have time to go out of the way last night, so I checked out Burrito Bandidos on Walmer. It's quite good; they are exactly like Burrito Broz.


Hey, it's the oft celebrating young photographer Leanne Eisen! It was a day for star sightings.


Here we have a fireman getting involved. You probably can't see it here, but he was smiling. Last night had the "rolling party" atmosphere that a lot of the more "police intervention-ey" masses don't.


More about the star sightings that I mentioned earlier. I am not great with faces, but I think that I saw Sook-Yin Lee stopped in a car, near the CBC where she works. A few blocks later, I saw Michael Cera. I am more sure about having seen him because I heard someone behind me say "It's George Michael!" He's in Toronto to film Scott Pilgrim vs. The World, and I think he was driving his parent's Camry.



And this is a time lapse video I took of the proceedings.

Mini Critical Mass of Police Officers

From atop the bridge to Riverdale Park, I spied four officers riding up Bayview and taking up a lane of space that should be reserved for cars, god damn it!

There's No Way In Hell I'm Attending Mass Tonight

Critical mass is no fun in the winter. Riding in the winter is only enjoyable if you are going fast enough to stay warm.

Car Free Day 2008

Video from today's incredible car free day parade on Queen West. The critical mass ride was smaller than usual, but still a lot of fun. There were lots of newbies.

Critical March

Wicked turnout eh. I left at around 7:45 because I couldn't feel my toes. I think a lot of people left at the same time, because there was a mini-'Mass heading Westbound on College as I sat and ate my margherita slice at Massimo's.

Toronto Critical Mass July 07

Critical Mass Review: Chaos is good

I find that I get a bit antsier than usual when critical masses are as huge as the one tonight. It is all good though. Here is the run down:

1. This had to be one of the biggest Masses I have ever been at. It was bloody huge.
   
2. I corked at avenue and Cumberland right after mass started. There were a bunch of n00bs at the front, so I kind of got to decide to turn right. Awesome.
3. Heading down Yonge was better than usual. We've had some business with streetcars on College a couple of times, but today was cool.
4. That Tall Bike! That was pretty cool. I tried to stay away from it as much as possible though.
5. We got split into two groups on University thanks to the police car behind us chirping. We managed to reunite. It is cool to think that there were two groups of cyclists large enough to take back the streets in downtown Toronto at once.
6. What was with the n00bs biking down the wrong side of the street all night? That's not how we roll.
7. The incident with the fire truck at Queen and Bathurst went quite well, considering.
8. I am happy that we continued from Bike Pirates.

All in all this was an awesome mass. Here is how I remember the route: